The question is why do you need my skills? And, how will they make a difference to you?
My role is to empower you through the challenging times you face, and need care, support and company to deal with:
- You face sudden or ongoing life changes and want some clarity or
- You require some strength, some more robust well-being or
- Your life or heart being ripped apart by experiences around loss, dying, death or bereavement or
- You’re facing death and require skills to get through – a listening ear, a voice to express what you need said or methods to celebrate life as it is now or
- You need to design a service to say goodbye to your loved one or
Any combination of the above. I am available to co-create with you to get you through these times of turmoil and the stresses you face.
At the Core of My Work
Dealing with Midlifer problems
In my mid-fifties myself, I witness more change and death. I witness the complexities of aging, dying, the need to attend to frailer older generations and the confusions middle-age can bring. And how some reflect their journey of life.
In midlife, with “Much is behind me, yet much is to come”, many people start to ask questions:
Where have I been and where am I going to?
Where am I now? And, what does my future look like or hold?
What is my legacy? What do I want to be remembered for?
Life can bring so many stresses; leaving many people feeling lonely, distressed and driven by inner demands and pressures, in a world that seems hellbent on ramping up the pain.
A possible solution:
When you need me to, I will deeply listen to you; I will engage with you and help you to find creative, effective, solutions to fit your personal needs and I will provide some practical help to deal with what you face.
Why? Because I know how liberating it is to move from these stuck states and to rediscover a new more comfortable awareness.
Like you, I’m a Midlifer, I’ve seen many things, just as you have. I was just too stubborn to release many things earlier; it is through other people aiding me on my journey, that I am where I am today. You, too, can find a new perspective, and see life in a different way.
The problems of Dying, Death and Bereavement
Simply, these are complex; too many things demand attention – emotions, feelings, fears and people – with no way of knowing where to start and how to cope.
The confusions they cause batter and assault your life, causing even more distress, whilst you try to make clear decisions about what needs your attention.
A potential solution:
We can work together for you to find creative, effective, solutions to your personal needs and practical solutions to deal with what you face.
I will deeply listen and engage with you, giving you the opportunity to dip into your inner-power, find clarity and make decisions; this work is my vocation. When you have new perspectives, you can shift towards a place that may prove easier to manage what you face.
The format of the sessions offers both personal reflective time and conversational support in a well balanced manner. It allowed me to look at a situation from a perspective that I hadn’t considered before and this constituted the starting point for a real movement forward in my life. I felt stuck in my self development and now, I experience a renewed sense of flow and positivity. I would recommend this approach to anyone in need of a shift in their life.
Benn supported and helped me during a time of great personal distress and grief… my emotions were impaired and my focus was one of sadness and pain. He was caring and supportive and helped me regain my sense of dignity and purpose. The difference this has made is beyond measure, because I was able to help myself (with Benn’s wisdom and guidance), to know and heal myself.
Want to know more about something? Please connect!
Within you, you have remarkable resources to deal with any time of transition (change or loss) that affects your life.
You just need to [re-]find these resources.
Potential solution: Choose a service that enables you to deal with both the acute/current problem – a transition, loss, bereavement – and empowers you towards your own independence towards the future.
Do this and you’ll attain incredibly powerful results and clarity. Click here for more information.
Being 35 – 65 [in midlife] is a potent time of challenge when you become increasingly aware of mortality and death – of parents, of family – even your own… Parents age, children grow, things change and life demands so much…
Everything gathered together makes coping impossible as heartbreaks, sanity and conflicting emotions struggle to deal with such demands. And you feel a sense of loss of self; even traumatised.
Potential solution: Choose a holistic Midlifer Life-Changing bespoke service that’s, personalised to you and your needs.
Options include: herbal medicine, personalised mentoring and care to explore and find your own sense of well-being. Click here for more information.
End of Life & Living Funerals
Each individual is unique and deserves their opportunity to celebrate their life whilst hale of mind, if not hale in body. To lift a glass with loved ones, to smile, to touch, to hug, to have one last dance. To laugh; to cry.
Potential solution: Living funerals or “awake wakes” are special, well-held spaces for one at end of life to say their farewells in person. For family and friends to make memories; share love; to remember the beauty of life, even as life is fading.
You get to celebrate your life together unrestricted by chapel times and death getting in the way. Click here for more information.
Dealing with Death
At death, the person we knew is no more. Losing their personality changes everything and forms much of the grief you may face – you may longer hold them, care for them, or experience their presence for they are silent. But your love is not.
Cultural beliefs may include don’t discuss “it” for it may be contagious; ignore it; fear it; don’t acknowledge it. If you follow these ideas, then death can’t overwhelm you…
These old customs encourage keeping silent about the painful, frightening things of life. Whilst no one may listen to how you feel, they will tell you should deal with your emotions, to fix your mind, thoughts and feelings. Question is: how would you like to feel?
Potential solution: When you choose to release bottled up emotions without judgement, you’ll feel cared for and released from the darkness of pain.
This can be achieved by regaining perspective of your life through airing what you’re thinking and feeling about your grief. With a person detached from the rest of your world in a safe, confidential environment. Click here for more information.
There are many ways to design or host a funeral. For some people, tradition is essential; for others, a service without the sombre, formalised rituals suits them as a preference.
Many modern funerals are personalised with a blend of tradition with modern ritual that fits the one who has died, and their family. Whether this is religious, secular, with or without spirituality.
Potential solution: You require a completely different way of doing a funeral. One that encompasses the one who has died; their and your beliefs and rituals; one that fulfils your needs as you say farewell in whatever way works for you. For you have designed and created a funeral you’ll cherish and value by working with a professional. Click here for more information.
Grief & Bereavement
Grief – the experience of loss and how you deal with it – is very individual to you.
Loss comes in many forms; the end of a life, the end of a relationship, the end of a role at work, significant life changes such as moving home or a health crisis…
One description of grief is “heartbreak”, a devastation that may influence an entire life, to be invisibly ingrained with far-reaching effects.
How you respond to these knocks and heartbreaks depends upon your resilience and perspective.
Potential solution: When you gain a fresh perspective, you arrive at a place you can deal with something that [invisibly] traps you. On release, you can regain your inner strength to face life. Click here for more information.