The question is why do you need my skills? And, how will they make a difference to you?
My role is to empower you through the challenging times you face, and need care, support and company to deal with:
- You face sudden or ongoing life changes and want some clarity or
- You require some strength, some more robust well-being or
- Your life or heart being ripped apart by experiences around loss, dying, death or bereavement or
- You’re facing death and require skills to get through – a listening ear, a voice to express what you need said or methods to celebrate life as it is now or
- You need to design a service to say goodbye to your loved one or
Any combination of the above. I am available to co-create with you to get you through these times of turmoil and the stresses you face.
At the Core of My Work
Dealing with Midlifer problems
In my mid-fifties myself, I witness more change and death. I witness the complexities of aging, dying, the need to attend to frailer older generations and the confusions middle-age can bring. And how some reflect their journey of life.
In midlife, with “Much is behind me, yet much is to come”, many people start to ask questions:
Where have I been and where am I going to?
Where am I now? And, what does my future look like or hold?
What is my legacy? What do I want to be remembered for?
Life can bring so many stresses; leaving many people feeling lonely, distressed and driven by inner demands and pressures, in a world that seems hellbent on ramping up the pain.
A possible solution:
When you need me to, I will deeply listen to you; I will engage with you and help you to find creative, effective, solutions to fit your personal needs and I will provide some practical help to deal with what you face.
Why? Because I know how liberating it is to move from these stuck states and to rediscover a new more comfortable awareness.
Like you, I’m a Midlifer, I’ve seen many things, just as you have. I was just too stubborn to release many things earlier; it is through other people aiding me on my journey, that I am where I am today. You, too, can find a new perspective, and see life in a different way.
The problems of Dying, Death and Bereavement
Simply, these are complex; too many things demand attention – emotions, feelings, fears and people – with no way of knowing where to start and how to cope.
The confusions they cause batter and assault your life, causing even more distress, whilst you try to make clear decisions about what needs your attention.
A potential solution:
We can work together for you to find creative, effective, solutions to your personal needs and practical solutions to deal with what you face.
I will deeply listen and engage with you, giving you the opportunity to dip into your inner-power, find clarity and make decisions; this work is my vocation. When you have new perspectives, you can shift towards a place that may prove easier to manage what you face.
The format of the sessions offers both personal reflective time and conversational support in a well balanced manner. It allowed me to look at a situation from a perspective that I hadn’t considered before and this constituted the starting point for a real movement forward in my life. I felt stuck in my self development and now, I experience a renewed sense of flow and positivity. I would recommend this approach to anyone in need of a shift in their life.- Michele M., Physiotherapist
Benn supported and helped me during a time of great personal distress and grief… my emotions were impaired and my focus was one of sadness and pain. He was caring and supportive and helped me regain my sense of dignity and purpose. The difference this has made is beyond measure, because I was able to help myself (with Benn’s wisdom and guidance), to know and heal myself.- The Reverend Noel Lockyer-Stevens
Want to know more about something? Please connect!
Transitions include the pain, grief and confusion of a lost relationship, a lost known, a death; facing your own vulnerability and so much more.
You have resources and resilience to deal with these issues, though they need marshalling to get you through.
Choose a service that enables you to dip into and deal with your life changes, transitions, bereavements, turmoils and confusions. Do this and you’ll attain incredibly powerful results and clarity click here
Midlife, from 35 – 65, is a pincer time. You become aware of your aging and mortality; and the complexities of aging parents, children, relationships and dying, death and grief.
By midlife, you’re expected to have the answers to everything life throws your way. However, your emotions, your sense of sanity and your ability to cope are hindered by your losses and heartbreaks.
Holistic Midlifer Life-Changing Packages are bespoke services, personalised to you and your needs.
You choose the options for your needs: herbal medicine, personalised mentoring and care to explore and find your own sense of well-being click here
End of Life & Living Funerals
Each experience of end of life is totally individual, independent and unique. For those hale in mind, yet frail of body, this can provide an ideal opportunity to celebrate with your loved ones. To lift a glass and to laugh, cry, reminisce, touch, hug, to have one last dance.
Living funerals or “awake wakes” are special, well-held spaces for you to be in the company of friends and family, making memories; sharing love and remembering the beauty of life, even as life is fading. You celebrate your life together unrestricted by chapel times and death getting in the way click here
Dealing with Death
The one thing we know for sure at death is that the person we knew is no more. And, it’s losing that personality that makes for such a difficult time. We can no longer love them the way we did; their hands are cold, their heart no longer beats. There is silence where once there was vibrant energy.
With death comes taboos – don’t discuss it; it may be contagious; ignore it; fear it; don’t acknowledge it, that way death can’t overwhelm you.
The old customs encourage not talking about the painful, frightening things of life, and there are no rules of how you “should” deal with your feelings and pain, though many people may tell you how to, ought or should fix your mind, thoughts and feelings.
How would you like to feel? Liberated, released from the darkness of the pain?
Regain perspective of your life by airing what you’re thinking and feeling with a person detached from the rest of your world. From this, you can release emotions bottled up, whilst you feel cared and safe. Click here
Death has many, often sombre, formalised rituals and traditions that don’t suit everyone. The landscape of funerals is moving towards personalised services the life of the person who has died, and the needs of the people saying goodbye to them.
Modern choices include rituals that are either secular or non-religious, some with spirituality included, some no elements of spirituality or religion at all.
You may need a completely different experience from the established way of doing a funeral. If that is true, create and design a funeral you’ll cherish and value; work with a professional and get just what you need click here
Grief & Bereavement
How you deal with grief and bereavement is very individual. They in your life whenever any loss happens, not just because of death e.g. at the end of a friendship, relationship; a career or job role; retirement; moving home; a health crisis, to name a few.
One description of grief is “heartbreak”, an experience of devastating, one that can influence a lifetime, to become so ingrained it’s invisible.
How you respond to these knocks of life and death depends on your resilience and perspective.
When you gain a fresh perspective, you arrive at a place you can deal with something that traps you, is released. Click here