About Benn Abdy-Collins

Bridging the Gap

Based in Greenford, Middlesex, West London

As a Professional Medical Herbalist (1993), and Funeral Celebrant (2017), I specialise in empowering people through times of Transition and change.

The question is why? Why do I do what I do and how will that make a difference to you?

I have faced many times of distress, grief, upset and confusion in my life. My experiences and understanding give depth to the work I do. I’d never have chosen these trials and tribulations, BUT they empower me empathise with what other people go through and face.

Ultimately, there are no answers to life. There is common sense and there are perspectives we can take to deal with the lives we live. That’s what I am here for.

Key Facts About Benn

  • By 40 I had lived at 41 different postal addresses, attended 13 different schools and colleges (including school in Nigeria)
  • My Mum died when I was 40; I felt the last pulses of her heart, closed her eyes and helped lay out her body

  • I have facilitated many workshops, retreats and seminars on well being, on values and on communication skills based on deep listening, over many years. And I speak professionally on death, transitions with stories and humour.

A Poem

When my Mum was diagnosed with secondary cancer, I was inspired to write a poem. I read the poem during her funeral and at the celebration of her life. The same poem has been read during other funerals.

In My Passing

 

I’m free now, relieved

Cherish my freedom and celebrate

My passing; allow my journey to

Continue without any extra weight.

Always remember, we have shared

Our lives, our times, together.

Not all times were easy

Nor our beliefs and choices the same,

When our souls were bared.

If ever I have left you

Feeling afraid and alone,

Forgive me. I ask.

Are we ever ready

For the living task?

Please do not grieve for me

For in my going, my suffering has gone.

With the pain and crying

Release from dying has come along.

I dance now in a better place;

May you dance now too and

Remember I love you;

Live and enjoy your unique grace.

Want to know more about something? Please connect!

What Would YOU Like to Explore?

Transitions Mentoring

Transitions include the pain, grief and confusion of a lost relationship, a lost known, a death; facing your own vulnerability and so much more.

You have resources and resilience to deal with these issues, though they need marshalling to get you through.

A Solution:

Choose a service that enables you to dip into and deal with your life changes, transitions, bereavements, turmoils and confusions. Do this and you’ll attain incredibly powerful results and clarity click here

Midlife

Midlife, from 35 – 65, is a pincer time. You become aware of your aging and mortality; and the complexities of aging parents, children, relationships and dying, death and grief.

By midlife, you’re expected to have the answers to everything life throws your way. However, your emotions, your sense of sanity and your ability to cope are hindered by your losses and heartbreaks.

A Solution:

Holistic Midlifer Life-Changing Packages are bespoke services, personalised to you and your needs.
You choose the options for your needs: herbal medicine, personalised mentoring and care to explore and find your own sense of well-being click here

End of Life & Living Funerals

Each experience of end of life is totally individual, independent and unique. For those hale in mind, yet frail of body, this can provide an ideal opportunity to celebrate with your loved ones. To lift a glass and to laugh, cry, reminisce, touch, hug, to have one last dance.

A Solution:

Living funerals or “awake wakes” are special, well-held spaces for you to be in the company of friends and family, making memories; sharing love and remembering the beauty of life, even as life is fading. You celebrate your life together unrestricted by chapel times and death getting in the way click here

Dealing with Death

The one thing we know for sure at death is that the person we knew is no more. And, it’s losing that personality that makes for such a difficult time. We can no longer love them the way we did; their hands are cold, their heart no longer beats. There is silence where once there was vibrant energy.

With death comes taboos – don’t discuss it; it may be contagious; ignore it; fear it; don’t acknowledge it, that way death can’t overwhelm you.

The old customs encourage not talking about the painful, frightening things of life, and there are no rules of how you “should” deal with your feelings and pain, though many people may tell you how to, ought or should fix your mind, thoughts and feelings.

How would you like to feel? Liberated, released from the darkness of the pain?

A Solution:
Regain perspective of your life by airing what you’re thinking and feeling with a person detached from the rest of your world. From this, you can release emotions bottled up, whilst you feel cared and safe. Click here

Funerals

Death has many, often sombre, formalised rituals and traditions that don’t suit everyone. The landscape of funerals is moving towards personalised services the life of the person who has died, and the needs of the people saying goodbye to them.

Modern choices include rituals that are either secular or non-religious, some with spirituality included, some no elements of spirituality or religion at all.

A Solution:

You may need a completely different experience from the established way of doing a funeral. If that is true, create and design a funeral you’ll cherish and value; work with a professional and get just what you need click here

Grief & Bereavement

How you deal with grief and bereavement is very individual. They in your life whenever any loss happens, not just because of death e.g. at the end of a friendship, relationship; a career or job role; retirement; moving home; a health crisis, to name a few.

One description of grief is “heartbreak”, an experience of devastating, one that can influence a lifetime, to become so ingrained it’s invisible.

How you respond to these knocks of life and death depends on your resilience and perspective.

A Solution:
When you gain a fresh perspective, you arrive at a place you can deal with something that traps you, is released. Click here

Want to know more about something? Please connect!

If you subscribe to my newsletter...

you'll receive my latest news and updates.

Thanks! You've successfully subscribed!